Well, Dammit Janet! Directed by Victor Nelli Jr, this is his penultimate episode of the season, before helming the finale in “Jump.” It is also the penultimate episode for our writer this season, though next time he only worked on the teleplay for “Betty’s Baby Bump;”. It is, of course, Bill Wrubel. Following that, Wrubel will have two more Ugly Betty episodes before moving on to Modern Family and eventually one of– No, the greatest show of all time, Ted Lasso. If season 4 is poor, I’m blaming him.

As Amanda finds everyone has found out about the sex dungeon and has begun using it as a cafeteria overflow/afternoon nap room, she starts removing her mother’s stuff. By the way, did you know Amanda was Fey’s daughter? It is not like she talks about it. Meanwhile, Claire Meade is on trial for killing Amanda’s mother, who was Fey Sommers, if you didn’t know, and at the request of “the Amazon Transsexual” (we’ll get to it) and Daniel, Betty goes to get some of Claire’s things.

It also happens to be the episode where Christina is ordered by Wilhelmina to be injected with a dead man’s juice, and Betty gets arrested. Oh, and Daniel is caught on camera bribing a judge. Gio is also back, while Henry is off to Tucson to deal with some baby stuff. If only there were something else to talk about in all of this. Oh yeah, Amanda finds Fey’s diary pages on the back of a picture frame, explaining in detail how Fey was trying to poison Claire with a perfume bottle, the same perfume that Claire gives Betty.

Listen, all I am saying is that 1) this episode doesn’t have enough sweet Transsexuals from the galaxy of Transylvania, and 2) finally, we have an in-universe bit of madness to explain the stupid character moments. So let’s start with Betty being arrested for breaking Gio’s window in his shop (he already owns a shop, I guess); we have one of those “three days earlier” things some shows love to do a bit too much. Going far enough back to the first witness testimony by Claire’s kids, first up, Alexis.

There is nothing defensible about that whole scene. Playing District Attorney Weitz, ER’s Paul McCrane is horrible while grilling Alexis by trying to use her transition to color the jury’s opinion of Alexis’ characterization of Claire. As if going through with a transition alters your mental state to characterize your own mother. Sadly, this is still a perception within the population that is very anti-trans, claiming that it is little more than a mental illness. All I am going to say is that I’d rather see someone transition than not be here to see a better tomorrow.

Daniel’s line about Alexis being “the Amazon Transsexual,” as a counter to her suggestion that the family needs to be perceived as normal, doesn’t help the matter either. Even if she is taller than him, usually, and would be described as an Amazonian woman, where it comes from is very much punching down. Not that he helps his mother’s case either, offering to split $20 with the judge when getting coffee, with cameras and the prosecution viewing that as bribing a judge. With Judge Heller recusing herself, we get Caroline Aaron’s Judge Biotch (pronounced: Bitch with an O).

Before we even got there though, Betty went to get some of Claire’s things, including a perfume bottle that an officer says Claire can’t have. So, unwittingly, Claire hands it to Betty, with Claire resigning herself to a lifetime in prison, not knowing what Amanda finds out. Finding pages of Fey’s diary in the back of a canvas picture frame, it turns out Fey bought it while on a trip with Bradford in Europe. She swapped out the perfume for hallucinogens in an attempt to turn Claire crazy and hope she turns, I guess, suicidal.

How did that work out for you, Fey? So, after some encouragement from Claire just to take it, it is hers now; Betty finally sprays herself with the perfume. Well, “methyldexetrin, linbin and fitzadent, and Bufo Alvarius:” A fake mix of meth and a stimulant for the show, a made-up thing and a play on denture adhesive, and the third is, of course, the Colorado River Toad, with a psychoactive toxin on its skin. Fey Sommers (Amanda’s mother) is drugging Betty from the grave and making her go crazy. This is the sort of thing I need to explain stupid behaviors.

I can hear the “but, but, but,” though I get enough of that from your dad when he throws that thing back; I just don’t care. Much like the best of Fast & Furious, a line or a little bit of story explaining why a character is stupid or crazy can get you very-very far. A toxic mix of psychotropics aimed at driving someone crazy and possibly suicidal is exactly what I need to explain why Betty and Henry baby-talk at each other so much and why Betty’s thighs are crying for Gio. Also, when I say Betty and Henry baby-talk at each other, I choose that phrasing specifically.

So, what exactly does the “perfume” do to Betty? One spritz and she’s typing away like I do when it is faux-E3 time, nearly wants to clear her desk off and shag Henry where they stand, and for some reason is very itchy and acting like a child. You know, the type of thing that makes you do murder and almost snog the sandwich guy when he shows up too. So how does she get arrested? Did she Diana someone else? No, she picked up a bin and broke into Gio’s shop before sleeping off an all-nighter on his floor.

Again, any other episode where she did this, I’d be moaning about it as I have for months at this point, but there is an in-world reason. As Matt and Trey point out in that one video on writing that I often reference, it is about the “therefore,” “But,” and “Because,” not “This happened and this happened, and then this happened.” Take, for example, Claire in prison and on trial right now: Alexis came out and got Bradford arrested, but Daniel got him released. Betty spoke with Claire; therefore, Claire turned herself in.

To use another example, though it is sort of backtracking: Fey poisons Claire; therefore Claire kills Fey and goes to prison for it, Amanda finds Fey’s confession but has second thoughts about saving Claire (killing mummy and all), but is convinced of it after talking with Marc, and therefore Claire is found “Not guilty by reason of temporary insanity.” Turns out, you don’t need Brad Majors to be your attorney; you just need Betty Suarez to give him a bit of direction. Not that Barry Bostwick is useless, he’s got a couple of decent lines.

So, with the pornstar out of the picture, Wilhelmina’s scheme to fill someone else with her egg and Bradford’s crusty sock juice, she gets a funny idea to use Christina. With no HMO connected to her work with Mode, which can help with Stuart’s health issues, Christina needs to get $100K from somewhere. Now, where could it come from? Wilhelmina is offering to inject her with an “unknown donor’s” man milk, or she could sell the dress she found in the backroom of the closet that was worn by Jackie Onassis at the White House. Yeah, that trap house where guns keep going off, and they have shirtless fights on the lawn in June (GAY!!!).

As soon as Willy and her flying monkey get wind of the Jackie Kennedy dress, however, they plot to do away with that plan from Christina. I know it is not real and that this is just a show, but how could you, you horrible, evil people? Unbeknownst to Christina, the flying monkey or someone else found their way in and destroyed the dress, burning bits and cutting the whole thing to pieces. I’ll forgive tugging a dead man, I’ll forgive sleeping with someone else behind his back, and I’ll forgive all the other evil things, but not destroying that dress. You’re a monster!

Forcing her hand, Christina comes to Wilhelmina for the offer and accepts, taking Betty into the Turkey basting room. Sorry, I mean insemination room, though the way it is written, it is the same difference. A small peek behind the curtain for those who don’t know: You can’t tell you’re pregnant the moment it is inserted into you. There is a reason people do multiple rounds of IVF and such, sometimes to quick results and sometimes to heartbreaking results and massive medical bills. It isn’t the same thing entirely, I get it, but you also wouldn’t have pregnancy confirmed 30 seconds after the K-Y jelly gets to body temp.

As an episode, “Odor in the Court” isn’t groundbreaking; it isn’t even an all-time great. It is a fine episode, more or less, with a couple of fun ideas and finally someone who understands how writing works to do all the crazy/mad stuff. Does it make up for all the Betty-Henry-Gio stuff already? No, nor does it allow for what comes next, but I do enjoy this bit of whimsy injected that makes some sort of in-universe sense. It is not realistic, but in the show, it is enough to explain the behavior.

Ultimately, “Odor in the Court” is a good pun and decent enough bit of storytelling, but nothing spectacular in terms of wider TV or for Ugly Betty itself. I like the guest star, as you might have guessed. I like little bits of the writing to clear some things up, and I like that we’ve gotten back to what the show felt like in season 1. Of course, it isn’t the best episode of the season; that’s probably come and gone already, but it was fun, light enough, and didn’t bog itself down too much beyond the Alexis cross-examination.

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Ugly Betty “Odor in the Court”

7.5

Score

7.5/10

Pros

• Finally, a reason to explain stupidity.
• Brad Majors-esquire.

Cons

• The cross-examination of Alexis being trans.
• Gio's back.