Invasion, insurgency, Iraq, Iran, all these words I totally associate with the holly, jolly time of Christmas. Written by season 2-4 of Gilmore Girls producer and writer, as well as Ugly Betty producer, Shelia Lawrence, this is the first of her 11 episodes. Lawrence also worked on a small show called The Marvelous Mrs Maisel, which is highly praised. “Fey’s Sleigh Ride” is directed by Tricia Brock, who has done a lot of different shows, but nothing too long-term. Brock directed The L Word, Veronica Mars, Breaking Bad, Pushing Daisies, The Walking Dead, obscure hospital drama Red Band Society, Mr Robot, and most recently, Bridgerton.

With Vincent Bianchi on board with the magazine’s bold new design, I see we’re still in the shadow of the 2003 invasion for oil. Meanwhile, Betty spent the night networking while the catty parade (Marc and Amanda) got bitter that everyone is cooing over the woman who saved Mode multiple times already. As it turns out, Justin’s class is doing a school project on someone each student admires, and our little queen from Queens gets to humiliate people on Aunt Betty’s behalf. Oh, and I almost forgot, Bradford’s music box that he stole from Fey’s estate, which was stolen by Wilhelmina (a cut/uncut scene), has gone missing.

Too bad that much like the world itself, the magazine goes up in flames because Betty couldn’t shut up during the networking night and the whole Iraq-invasion World War Three spread idea went up like Hiroshima. Well, it wasn’t Betty alone; this was the first time Marc and Amanda had to properly work with Betty to save not just the magazine but also themselves. With Wilhelmina on the warpath, Daniel stretching himself to think of a new idea, and Bradford trying to temper the woman in cloth, the assistant’s club needs to scheme and connive to keep their jobs.

Oh, it is getting quite juicy already in Meade towers, now isn’t it? As I’ve kept saying for a couple of weeks now, it is not only getting juicy, but it is getting wholesome in places you wouldn’t expect. While everyone is fawning over Betty at the networking night, someone (Betty, Amanda, Marc, and someone else) leaked Mode’s December issue spread, a post-apocalyptic Christmas. Someone from sister/rival magazine, Isabella, is taking the ideas and taking almost all the props, designers, and everything else. The editorial team needs to find a new idea and the leaker.

There is a reason I said that “Queens for a Day” was “the best the show has to offer thus far,” as we’re full-on and non-stop this time out. Though before I start quoting the funny lines and talking plot points, I think we need to talk about the elephant in the room. With the production code 105 but airing as the fourth episode, there was a bit of chopping and changing throughout this season. On the DVDs, “Fey’s Sleigh Ride” is still supposed to be episode 5, but I think it is better to go through this the same way it aired for several reasons – some quite boring.

A large portion of “Fey’s Sleigh Ride” is the tension of Wilhelmina ready to grab people by the throat and throw them through walls for leaking Mode’s December issue. With Marc hyperventilating, Amanda stress eating, and Betty looking like a deer in headlights, this sort of goes to something Michael and Becki talk about in their podcast, where they revisit the show. Every time there is something too whacky or out there going on, the camera will almost always cut to America because she tells you exactly what this moment is, no matter what. This is the episode where I think that rings true the most.

Yet, interspersed throughout the episode is the story of Justin being at Mode for the first time, and of course, the mystery woman/Fey’s death conspiracy. As I say, the production on this one is all over the place, so some versions of the episode had Wilhelmina stealing Fey’s box from Bradford as part of the “Previously on…” while other versions don’t have it at all, I believe. Let’s just pretend it is part of the episode because both boxes are rather significant to the episode overall.

If I haven’t made this clear enough yet, “Fey’s Sleigh Ride” is packed to the brim, for better or worse. The night before everyone is being called in front of the scary-shouty woman, Justin tells Hilda and Betty about this class project, where he gets a day off school to follow around someone who inspires him. I’ve already said it, “our little queen from Queens” doesn’t want to go to school for reasons that are about as bright and colorful (and popular) as certain parades in June. Much like Wilhelmina, if you badmouth Justin for being gay, I’ll personally throw you through a wall.

Despite writing these with far too much time on my hands, I’m constantly struggling to hold back my want to scream that I’ll protect every single one of these characters from any badmouthing. Even Marc and Amanda, and this is the episode where that becomes a bit too obvious to ignore, even as Amanda is so dumb and so Amanda that you just feel kind of sad for her.

I have to apologize for being a bit all over the place recap-wise, but when it’s revealed that there was a leak, Betty, Marc, and Amanda went into the bathrooms, and Amanda started stress-eating. However, I forgot the line Amanda says when Betty suggests she’ll admit to leaking the spread, Amanda simply says, “Have you been smoking one of your ponchos?” It is supposed to be a horrible line from a place of ignorance, but I did catch myself making a noise at that. Be it from just forgetting it or Becki Newton’s line delivery, it was one of the few lines I had to write down.

There was even a joke I thought of after Christina’s “little people” comment when she says she loves having Justin around. I’ll save you that and go on to another line instead. With the magazine in disarray, Amanda is ordered to get food and lay it out, only to come out of that looking like she was in a war. Effectively, everyone is ordered to stay at the magazine until the creative team can come up with and organize a new December center spread of the magazine. That’s where we get the title from.

Eventually, after Wilhelmina, Daniel, and Vincent have looked through 50 years of backlog issues of Mode’s December spreads. December 1986, a year that Daniel says “know it well.” That isn’t the quote I’m getting to, a bit before they come up with this idea, Betty wants to admit to Daniel that she’s partly the leak, and he refuses, saying, “Listen to me. I don’t have to know about everything, especially if knowing about it means I’d end up losing you.” One, is this still the same Daniel from “Pilot?”, and two, I love Ugly Betty.

However, the line I wanted to highlight was from a little earlier in that discussion, where Daniel tells Betty, “You can take off. I’m sure your nephew is sick of the closet.” Daniel, honey, he ain’t even out of the closet outright, I don’t think he’s going to be sick of a fashion magazine’s closet either. That’s what I think this episode really nails for me, its ability to take something as simple as a character just being, and almost 20 years later, it is hitting just as hard.

I won’t go into the details of the box and the mystery; the bits that are revealed, you can watch the episode yourself for that. Nonetheless, Daniel and Wilhelmina pull off this idea to recreate Fey’s sleigh ride center spread from the 1986 issue in the year of her death, with an empty sleigh and another version of the same box. Despite all of this and the reveals there, we get a moment with Marc and Justin where, without saying outright, Marc becomes so warm and caring because he knows what it was like being the little gay kid in middle/high school.

What I keep coming back to as I think of “Fey’s Sleigh Ride” and of Ugly Betty in general is that we’ve got a show that was more progressive 20 years ago than we have now. It isn’t the only obscenely progressive show on ABC at this point; Boston Legal is a whole other thing I could get into, which was airing the same weeks as Ugly Betty. However, this felt personal and like a warm hug, not just to the character of Justin, but to fans who were not ready to come out yet but knew exactly who they were.

A slight break from the constant bickering and scheming by Wilhelmina and Marc, “Fey’s Sleigh Ride” doesn’t let up on the drama, the conspiracy, and overall cattiness of the show’s setting or its heartwarming moments. It’s not only refreshing despite being only a couple of episodes in, but it is also once again arguably one of the better episodes, and not just thus far. “Fey’s Sleigh Ride” is a testament to the show’s style and substance, even though we’re only a couple of episodes in.

Ultimately, “Fey’s Sleigh Ride” is as juicy as ever with its dark conspiracy and bright, light fashion magazine setting, but also brings so much love and care when the show needs it the most. Those last few scenes with Justin at the studio, where the center spread is being shot they are what this show is about in a nutshell. Those and the comedy of Amanda and Ignacio becoming best friends over Flan. Even without the bits I’ve not mentioned, this is an episode of Ugly Betty that never fails to make me smile for one reason or another.

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Ugly Betty “Fey’s Sleigh Ride”

8.5

Score

8.5/10

Pros

• Despite still being horrible to Betty, Marc and Amanda are lovely.
• Marc's chat with Justin.
• Vanessa Williams wearing those antlers, love it.
• Justin's comments on Amanda's shoes.
• A few quotable lines.

Cons

• Production issues resulted in variations of the episode.