For those that come after. Directed by Maja Vrvilo, Vrvilo is best known for episode 17 of Limitless, the first of Short Treks, two of Picard, two of Discovery, two previous episodes of Strange New Worlds, as well as two from The Wheel of Time, and 6 of 2017’s S.W.A.T. While writing comes from “Four-and-a-Half Vulcans” writer Dana Horgan and “Through the Lens of Time” writer Davy Perez. I’ll admit that I didn’t have high hopes for “New Life and New Civilizations,” but I didn’t know that I’d have so many “Why?” moments.

After returning from being Starfleet’s top lawyer/judge, Batel is greeted with a big dinner in Pike’s quarters with the top crew. A dinner where Spock brings up the language of the imprisoned beings from “Through the Lens of Time,” where it was implied that because of her Gorn-hatchlings inside her, Batel instantly wanted to kill whatever took over Gamble. Cue us getting a look at Roger on a far-off planet with islands looking like the surroundings of Lumiére with those weird floating temples and mystical people. Shock, horror, no, really, you totally got me off-guard with the Poké-balled Vezda-Gamble now showing up to be the leader of the cult.

So, after not calling Christine for 12 hours (damn woman!) the crew of the Enterprise mounts a rescue mission hours after Roger wasn’t sucked off into a space temple/prison. The story of “New Life and New Civilizations” being that Vezda-Gamble wants to free all Vezda from the prison they’ve been in, the crew needs to save Roger and the universe from the Vezda, and Marie is just the most special person in the universe. Oh, and we get a 10-15 minute “This is Your Life” segment of Pike surviving the fate he’s been shown and we know happens.

This is the third time I am asking this, but what was this third season supposed to say or do to the overall plot? I can’t work it out, and I can’t see where the thinking comes from overall. I get it, maybe the Writer’s Strike took a toll on getting the season together from a writing and production standpoint, but as soon as I was done with this episode, I sent my editor, “So… I’ve just finished SNW. [takes a beat] I could have waited another year.” To which I stand by that point several weeks after the fact.

WARNING: The rest of this article may contain spoilers for the episode “New Life and New Civilizations.” Reader’s discretion is advised.

Over the last couple of weeks, I’ve noted the joint statement quote by the lead producers about how they get to complete their “five-season mission, just as we envisioned it.” The trouble here, I think, is that the vision was libated by lots of those tasty drugs I’ve heard so much about. Yes, that’s harsh, but I don’t think it is too harsh to question what the point was in any of this? What does this do to the 5-year mission? Why, just why?

Let’s focus in on Batel for a minute here: She’s infected with a Gorn parasite that is sedated in her body by the end of “Shuttle to Kenfori,” she has special CQC moves like her name is The Boss in “Through the Lens of Time,” and most importantly in “Four-and-a-Half Vulcans” she shouts down her boss for him to reveal he’s retiring and she’ll replace him as Starfleet’s Judge Advocate General. Once again proving my military theory, by the way. I won’t say what happens (yet), but she doesn’t hold that position for long after her first day(s) established early in this episode.

Why do all of that simply to yank her out of that role straight away, literally two episodes later? From a writing standpoint, you might think it results in growth somewhere for someone, but a logical in-universe standpoint says otherwise. It feels messy and not too dissimilar to Ncuti’s sudden departure from Doctor Who this year, though on a much smaller scale. Having a 10-15 minute This is Your Life segment between her and Pike living into old age, putting her in this job, then pulling it away, the reason for it, it all feels like a script cobbled together quickly to get production rolling following a major industry strike.

Speaking of the Black guy with the accent, was he the one Pelia traveled with? Was it the one with big ears, because I do love him? The one with the sand shoes? Maybe it was the one with the Fez. We basically have Pelia suggest that she traveled with a Doctor of some kind for a while, and I’ll be honest, I wasn’t happy about this second Doctor Who reference this season. We’re already doing a Muppets version of SNW next season, and season 5 is even shorter; a crossover episode isn’t going to happen unless it is fan-fic, which some of this season feels like anyway.

Once again, “Speaking of” the gay fan-fic of Star Trek, one of the major points this time out is Spock dominating James. I’ll get to the plot point here in a second, but they have to know what they are doing at this point, right? Otherwise, it is just gay-baiting, and I was not happy when Chibnal did it, so I’m not going to be happy with it here.

So Korby is “kidnapped” by the Vezda-Gamble Shaman, and the crew rushes to save him. The trouble is, to open the prison/temple gateway from inside the floating diamond church of space Scientology, you need the power of Sol (our sun), and you need two people to enter. With the help of the USS Farragut, Enterprise is poised to make like Frank Reynolds and start blasting. However, to do this, they need to be in sync. Cue Spock suggesting he and one James T Kirk do a Vulcan Mind Meld (ha! Gay…), have both ships do a graphic bird and bees visualization, and fire on the tiny target that is the temple/prison door so Pike and Batel can enter.

One little fight and Pike gets scared, he moves in with Batel in a weird dream sequence, and something something aunty and uncle in Bel Air. I’ll be honest and say that I don’t hate the scene, I don’t think it is terribly directed or written either, and I don’t really think it is bad at all. I’m just left asking again what the point was. I’ve said the point before that Marie Batel has entirely been to make me care about the people we’ve lost and blah blah blah, but I honestly don’t feel anything for the whole relationship. More so this season than others, Strange New Worlds has been fan-fic shipping with straight couples – the least interesting fan-fic.

Showing me snapshots of Batel and Pike living into their 70s-90s doesn’t work because, at the end of the day, we know it is a dream sequence. We know this is the life Pike would rather have; we’ve come to accept that he’s going to be paralyzed and heavily irradiated. It is wasted time trying to establish an emotional connection with something that many have already come to terms with or understood. From a writing standpoint, I can’t understand the need for an emotional moment unless you expect me to care about Batel, to which I ask, who?

If we look at the beats of the character, we have the partner Pike leaves to Captain the Enterprise. She is the partner who will sometimes show up and is a lawyer in Starfleet who will be antagonistic towards Una’s position, and the Captain of a lesser ship that’s attacked. From there, I think we’re picking up from last season into this one, and she’s done to put it lightly, “sod-and-all” the entire time. So have Una and Ortegas (until last time out), but still, we get more time with them. Honestly, it feels like 15 minutes of filler to show that she cares for Pike and he cares for her.

This isn’t a finale, this isn’t the finale to season 3, and this is hardly an episode of Star Trek aside from the set dressing and some magic space words. It was a waste of time, money, and energy on a show that can be really good when given the chance, but we’re sitting here pretending that somehow this is a climax. If this is a climax, I now know how your mum feels when your dad gives two thrusts and rolls over.

Instead of focusing on the alien that is the Vezda or the strange world, (spoiler if you haven’t clocked it yet), it is a big send-off to a character that, if I’m completely honest, doesn’t elicit a flicker of emotion. There is a Frankie Boyle line about watching someone being put through a disgustingly horrible circumstance (vague enough) and not feeling an ounce of emotion, and that’s about my summation of Batel. Nothing shown has made me care for her as much as I’ve cared for Odo’s pot, as an example.

That’s ultimately where I’m evidently left bored by the idea. Batel is sacrificed to save the universe, but honestly, you could have thrown anyone in that position and it would have made as much emotional connection because the pacing doesn’t work for the grand idea. I don’t want to do another one of those reviews where I say how it went wrong, how I’d fix it, then proceed to complain a bit more, but that’s where I’m at. I just want to say “this doesn’t work because of X or Y.”

However, I think I can summarize the problem with this finale in one simple point: Who is Gamble? The problem with Gamble being the big-bad of the season is that in episode 1, “Hegemony, Part II,” he doesn’t exist. At least to us. “Wedding Bell Blues” and “Shuttle to Kenfori” are episodes 2 and 3; he isn’t in them either. Nor is he in the fourth episode, “A Space Adventure Hour,” so his introduction literally comes halfway through the season in “Through the Lens of Time.”

You have no time to care for him, you have no desire to care for him, and you have nothing by the time he blows his big eyes out of that little head of his. But get this, right: The next time we see him or even think about him is… here. When he shows up out of nowhere, leading a cult to cure Covid-19 by drinking bleach, or whatever.

A good arc sets itself up efficiently and proceeds to give peaks throughout the story, leading to the climax. A bad arc – this season of SNW and Russell’s second run with Doctor Who – tells you the magic box has something special you want to see, then by the time it opens, the plot jangles keys on the other side of the room, shouting for attention. Other than actually making me dislike someone who’s Irish (which is hard in the first place), I don’t know anything season-wide that was set up efficiently. First, give Roger some personality, then we can talk about caring for him.

Sure, blame the writer’s strike, blame whoever you like. As a season of TV, Strange New Worlds season 3 and this final episode aren’t good TV either way, and that’s my problem with it on the whole. It is little more than telling me that there are big emotions to be had. The ideas are there, but the refinement, the details, the ability to make me enjoy what I’m seeing, the ability to make me excited for next week’s episode, and everything you should expect from a show you like isn’t there with this third season.

So Batel self-sacrificed, and there is a hint of Vezda still being around. My question once again is, what does this do to the overall plot? Does it change Pike? Sure, it means the person he’s supposed to love is dead, but that’s it. Batel is replaceable for Starfleet. Her role in the show is minimal, her arc is probably written on a coffee-stained, discolored napkin, and really, this does nothing major to the Enterprise or her crew. As a season finale, it doesn’t really set up for the next adventure with a two-parter, it doesn’t give us a new or redefined focus, and it really just feels like a mid-season departure of a not-so-important character.

Ultimately, “New Life and New Civilizations” forgets that we’ve seen the Vezda before, and the new civilization only appears for a few minutes before we focus in on the mid-season adventure of the week nonsense. I don’t want to say the episode is terrible, because to some degree it isn’t; it is just misguided as a finale. That and the Vulcan Mind Meld requires constant contact, and the fact that no editor or writer knew that is damning of this generation of Star Trek writers.

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SNW “New Life and New Civilizations”

5.5

Score

5.5/10

Pros

• Ha! Gay...

Cons

• Mind Meld requires constant contact.
• Why should I care about Marie?
• Nothing feels like a climax.